College Essay - Revision

I'm back to talk about college essays some more.  Did you notice that I took a break from the topic for a few days?  It may sound cheesy, but I did that intentionally because that is also what I am asking each of you to do after you finish your draft of your essay.  Be happy that you are pleased with your essay.  Put it down, walk away from it for a few days and then go back later and re-read it again.  

I have already had several students who had drafted their essay at the end of their junior year and then didn't worry about their essay all summer come into my office very worried because they thought they were done with their essay, but then they read it again this fall and realized it wasn't at all the way they had remembered it would sound.  They were disappointed to find that what they initially thought was great ended up falling short of their own expectations when they were able to look at the essay with fresh eyes.  They were shocked, but I was happy because this meant they were one major step closer to having a polished essay that accurately conveyed them.

My point is that once you have written your essay, you want to give plenty of time to edit!  I understand that this is (drastically) different than most of the essays you have written in high school, but it is worth writing a draft, walking away from it for a few days and then coming back to read it again to take a fresh look.

REVISING THE ESSAY
Taking the time to edit and go through multiple drafts is a gift you can give yourself to drastically decrease your stress with the entire college application process.  Here are some areas to keep in mind as you are revising your essay...

When you begin reading through your essay again ask yourself:

Does it reveal who you are?

Does it represent your best academic ability?

Does it sound like you? 

Look at the overall structure of the essay:

Does it make a stunning point at the beginning and then fizzle, or does it steadily build in interest and intensity?

Have you made clear the relationship between your ideas?

Is the essay well organized?

As you begin to get picky, look at your word choice and make sure you are not overusing particular words.  Pay careful attention to the verbs - they should give your reader a clear picture of you in action. Although the essay needs to be personal, you shouldn't overuse the pronoun "I."

The essay also needs to read smoothly. If it is a longer essay, as you revise and refine the piece, be sure that it has an attractive introduction, carefully crafted body paragraphs, and a confident conclusion. Look for clear transitions between paragraphs, and try to vary sentence length and structure.

One of the biggest challenges as you write your essay is controlling the tone.  You want to come across as confident but not boastful, self-assured but not aggressive, accomplished but not perfect. Try to avoid claiming that everything you've ever done has been unbelievably great.  Don't be afraid to admit that you are human. Colleges want real, interesting people.  Because it's so hard to control the tone of an essay about yourself, you will want to ask several people – teachers, friends, your parents, and even me – to read and respond to your essay. Get a variety of reactions, and then decide how you want to revise the essay.  Remember, when getting help with essay revisions it is important to go into it with the thought that you want to get revisions so it can be the best possible essay (instead of going in hoping the editors will just say – good enough.)  And yes, that also means you can’t procrastinate and put it off writing your essay until the last possible second.  And I hope this goes without saying, but don’t lie.  Do not make up stories that are not true or genuine.  You are the best you there is and this essay is about you so show yourself off and just be careful on tone.

Every year I have at least 1 student ask me if the colleges read the essays and I can assure you that the answer is YES – they really do read the essays!  Please don’t think you can just throw something down on paper and have it be “good enough.”  These are formal essays for an application to a college that will be the launching ground for the rest of your life.  I know that it sounds intimidating, but relax and start writing – and editing – and then do some more writing and editing… 

Please rest assured that I am here to help you with your essays.  I will NOT write it for you, but if you are struggling to come up with topics or want help editing, don't hesitate to stop by and see me.  Also, the English teachers and Ms. Elliott are awesome resources for editing help too.  Good luck and happy writing!