Choose Your Bottom

I'm sure you have heard the phrases about people hitting rock bottom.  And most of the time when I hear people talking about getting to those low places in their life they speak of it as if they can't get any worse.  Nothing else could go wrong beyond what has already happened.  And then, at that point, they are ready to make a change.

Here is the reality... for some people, that is absolutely how this has to work because many of us (1) don't like change, (2) find comfort in the familiar even if it is all falling apart around us, and (3) don't want to admit that we are struggling.

But the good news is that this does NOT have to be the way it works!  We all have the power to pick our bottom.  To say, this is as low as I can let myself go or get.  Know though, that making this change will require ACTION and COURAGE!  But, you have that inside of you and you CAN do this!  You can decide that enough is enough and that you are ready to make changes any time you want.  

I don't know about you, but I think that is a really encouraging thought.  I like control and being able to take some sense of control over my own life is a helpful thought for me.  But, that is also when fear and complacency can set in because if I want this to be the lowest that I get in my life then I am going to have to DO something DIFFERENT!  This might mean making different choices.  It could mean asking for help.  Perhaps it means spending time with new people.  Everyone's circumstances and areas of concern are different, but by digging deep inside yourself to find the courage to take action, change is possible and your life and the challenges you are facing can improve.

And, in case you are out there reading this and thinking, "that sounds nice Miss Abbott, but, no, I can't fix the fact that my mom is sick or my grandpa died."  And you are right.  There are absolutely heart-breaking events that will always cross our paths.  This is a part of life and it is not fair and it is hard, but you can get through even those difficult days by finding ways to take better care of yourself, by learning new coping strategies, by sharing your sadness with others so you aren't left feeling quite so alone in it all.

So my question for you today is how much lower do you need to go before you decide to make a change?  I know it can be scary to try something new or to admit that you need help, but the benefits can be beyond what you could imagine.  For example, I watched a video last weekend which included a high school boy who was really struggling in some of his classes.  He didn't like most of his teachers and he was challenged to do something new and different.  He was asked by one of his mentors to pick out the class where he was struggling the most, where he didn't feel connected to the teacher and to walk up to that teacher and say that he was struggling and didn't feel connected to the class or the teacher and that he wanted to change it.  I was floored as I heard this awkwardly phrased conversation play out.  But the reality is the boy said that being real and honest with his teacher had changed everything and now if he had problems in any class or with stuff outside of school he knew that he could always go to that teacher and that he was now one of his favorite people and biggest supporters in his life.  All because he had the COURAGE to take ACTION and make a CHANGE.  He decided that he was done with his classes and grades getting worse so he established his bottom and he did something different.  Never doubt that you can do that too!

It's helpful to keep in mind that no matter how low your bottom might be, once you are at your bottom, there is nowhere to go but up.  And if you are needing help or support in that climb back up, remember that I am here for you!