Take a deep breath

Breathing is important.  Obviously, you need oxygen and it happens without any thought - on average we each take about 960 breaths per hour (or 16 per minute).  And yet, it is something that we often don't do well... especially if we are stressed or upset!

When you are under a great deal of pressure, your body responds - again, without you having to think about it.  Your breathing often changes and your muscles will grow tense.  It is an automatic reaction that your body does in taking over functioning for you to prepare you to manage whatever danger is coming your way - think of it as your body going into an early "fight/ flight/ freeze" response.  But that is a challenge because your stress and frustration are not likely to need to prepare you to run from a lion or whatever other danger might have necessitated a fight, flight or freeze response and so we have to take back control over our body.

I have to acknowledge something.  I hate the concept of breathing as a stress reliever!  I. HATE. IT!  Except for the fact that it WORKS!

Even for me, when I am upset about something I often think to myself, "what would I tell my students right now" and the answer is always to slow down and take a few deep breaths.  And immediately I think again about how much I hate that answer because I always feel as if the problem I am facing is too big to be solved with by a few simple breaths.  But I do it anyway because that is what I ask each of you to do and then inevitably, it helps.  And, yes, as crazy as it is, it makes me mad that it works at the same time I am grateful that it is helpful.

Controlling your breathing is really important because it assures your brain that you are not in danger and it then allows your brain to be able to have the ability to think logically and talk about what is happening "left brain" rather than just staying in "right brain" mode of emotion.

But here is the reality, you need to practice deep breathing when you are calm and relaxed to help your body know how to relax itself and calm down with deep breaths when you are stressed out.  Again, I know it seems too simplistic and you are right, it is not going to make all of your problems go away, but it will help you to manage the challenges you are facing.

I also have lots of other breathing strategies (3/3/3, square breathing, double out, hot chocolate breathing, etc.) that we can practice together if you know that this is something you would like help focusing on to help with your emotional well-being.  I also like the breathing tool in the Virtual Hope Box app which you can download for free.