Tuesday, January 11, 2022

Perfectionism

I have some news for you... you're not perfect.  Neither am I.  And for some people who read that you think, "well of course not" and keep moving.  For others - those of you who tend to struggle with perfectionism - your thought process is more of, "I know I'm not, but I'm going to keep trying to be perfect and maybe I can convince some of you that I am perfect."  It's an exhausting hustle for approval that you can never win.

So how do you manage when you feel like you need to be perfect?  One shift in perspective that can help is to consider yourself a work in progress.  Rather than expecting yourself to have it all together at all times, let yourself be who you are today knowing that you can keep trying to build upon your strengths with each passing day.  That shift from "being perfect" to a "healthy striving" is a difference in being able to celebrate your growth and progress.  When you are trying to be perfect, anything less than 100% and total perfection is seen as a failure, but the reality is that it is NOT failure.  And to expect perfection of yourself when you are human and therefore not going to be perfect is setting yourself up for failure all the time as there will always be other people who know more, are bigger, faster, smarter or more talented than you.  But even though others may have specific strengths or abilities that you don't does NOT mean that you're not good enough or have value - it just means you're not perfect.  

As you work to make this mindset shift, try to remind yourself that no matter how good or bad a situation and experience you're having might be, you're never a finished product so you can let go of the pressure and goal of being perfect.

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